I don’t know about you, but potty training was one of the most overwhelming milestones to even think about broaching with TJ. Throw in a little brother who needs quite a bit of attention and a pandemic and every week I would say “maybe next week”. But, here we are with a little boy who loves his Lightning McQueen undies and is proud to tell everyone (I mean everyone) that he goes on the potty.
Our First Attempt
We decided to start thinking about potty training back in November of last year after TJ turned 2 in October. It was early, but I need to do my research and be as prepared as I can be for literally everything, so I read a few books and decided on the method we would use. We traveled for Christmas, and then both boys had ear infections in January, so we waited until February (TJ was 27 months old) when we would be home for a while and everyone was healthy, picked a weekend day that Tim was home, and ditched the diapers. I had talked to TJ about it a little bit, but didn’t make a big deal out of preparing him – mistake number 1. The method I had decided to use also includes taking off diapers and letting them be naked on the bottom for the first day – mistake number 2. While it makes total sense that it’s easier to see when they’re going or need to go when they’re not wearing anything, I should have known that TJ would not be on board. He couldn’t get comfortable sitting on the floor, he didn’t really know what he was supposed to be doing, and then…he had an accident. It wasn’t really an accident since he was on literally hour 1 of “potty training”, but he was devastated. My heart broke for him. I told him it was ok, we didn’t have to keep trying if he didn’t want to, and he said, “Mama, this is hard” so we put the diaper back on and shelved it.
Did We Did Differently the Second Time
Flash forward to May – TJ had finally stopped talking about the tragic poop in the playroom incident, and I was confident that he was ready. He was staying dry for long periods of time, he would tell me when he was going and immediately when he needed a diaper, and was interested in sitting on the potty himself. At this point he was 31 months and, as anyone with a toddler knows, every month of maturity makes a huge difference.
I also knew well enough to prepare him this time. For the week leading up to the day we decided to start, I told him “when Daddy gets home from work on Sunday, we’re going to be all done with diapers”. I also used the fact that he would get awful diaper rash to my advantage and told him that when he went on the potty, he wouldn’t have to worry about that anymore – that basically sold him on it. I also knew he needed to have something on when we took the diapers off – so he got to pick out undies. We ordered a pack of Thomas the Train undies and a pack of Lightning McQueen undies and we were ready.
The First Day
The day we decided would be Day One, as soon as TJ woke up, he knew it was potty day. Instead of changing his diaper, I brought him right into the bathroom, took his diaper off, and sat him on the potty. He went right away and I made a HUGE deal about it. I told him how amazing it was, how proud of him I was, and how I knew he could do it. We put his undies on and I told him to let me know if he had to go. I know there are many schools of thought and methods that say not to ask them if they have to go, to let them lead the way and learn how to recognize their own signs – after the disaster of our first attempt, I knew that wasn’t the best idea for TJ. He is, after all, only two-and-a-half and would definitely get distracted and forget that he was supposed to tell me when he had to go, or not realize he had to go at all. So, while I didn’t nag him and ask him every 10 seconds, I definitely reminded him every 15 minutes or so, and if he hadn’t gone in over an hour, I would bring him in the bathroom to sit on the potty and try to go. We went through about 6 pairs of underwear in the first two hours, but then he really started to get it quickly.
Rewards
Again, there are lots of schools of thought and theories about this. Initially, I agreed with the theory of not rewarding a behavior that will stick forever because it will be hard to stop giving rewards. But then I thought about it and realized we reward toddlers for everything they do well and every time they do something “right”, and this was no different. TJ was working hard to learn something new and the positive reinforcement worked really well for him. When he went on the potty, he got a chocolate chip. He did catch on to this system quickly and a few times he sat on the potty, didn’t go, and said “I tried, can I have a chocolate chip”…and then we knew he had figured it out. If he knew well enough to sit on the potty to get a chocolate chip, he knew when he had to go and what to do. So, at that point, we weaned the chocolate chips which took maybe a day.
Why Potty Training During Quarantine Worked
We were literally at home with nowhere to go and no temptations to leave. Perfect timing for potty training. We didn’t have anyone coming over that would distract TJ or us from what we were doing. I wasn’t really worried about him getting sick with a cold, ear infection, or any little bug that would derail potty training because we had no exposure to anything or anyone.
Why Potty Training During Quarantine Was Challenging
All the paper towels and toilet paper. Now that TJ really has this potty thing down and we are starting to go a few places, public restrooms are all closed. I’m thinking we’re going to need to get a potty chair to keep in the car, especially for when we go to visit my family in New Jersey next – he’s definitely not at the point that he can hold it until we find a potty.
I’m certainly not a potty training expert and I’m sure there are lots of other methods that work well, but this is what worked for us – I hope you found it helpful! Be sure to Pin this post for later, and head to Like to Know It to check out the potty seat we used and my favorite toddler boxer briefs (which are shockingly hard to find). All in all, it’s another milestone that felt so far away for so long and was so overwhelming to think about for me. But I’m so proud of how well TJ has done and how quickly he picked it up with the right preparation and method for him. Happy Potty Training, friends!
xo,
Stephanie
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